MCG: Fun Exclusion Zone?

One of the guys from Collective Apathy has asked me to post a rant on my site… seems that the Collective Apathy site is still down, denying Shovel of his outlet. So here is his rant, in full and unedited.

——– Original Message ——–
Subject: MCG: Fun Exclusion Zone?
Date: Thu, 27 Dec 2007 12:25:38 +1100

While retarded monkeys, the daughters of bloated egomaniacs and phone text addicts all chimed in to tell us how to ‘reinvent the game of cricket’ this week, all in the name of somehow restoring its status in Australia, Cricket Australia and the MCC did their very best it seems, to ensure this would not be an easy task by once again employing their “zero tolerance” policy toward cricket fans actually trying to bring some personality back into the stands.

While 2 visiting kiwi’s were ejected for a blatantly obvious joke sign from 7-11 ‘supporting Indians all over the world’, and others were ejected for standing on their seat to celebrate a century by one of Australia’s greatest opening batsmen, several makers of rollercoaster restraint harnesses were rubbing their hands with glee over the potential new contract to install their pull down overhead restraint systems to every seat inside the G.

Unconfirmed reports have been rife that the MCC has been drafting a request for tenders to install the restraint systems usually employed on rides that actually provide non-stop entertainment from the moment you get on. Despite cricket’s obvious lack of ‘non-stop entertainment’, the aging MCC board have apparently unanimously agreed it is the only way to save the purity of the game.

Personally, I’m all for the restraint system, because once the MCC has successfully alienated all potential visitors to “the greatest stadium on earth” (*cough*), and everybody just stays home and streaks across their own living room, they will be forced to make use of these restraint systems by turning the G into one giant “Gravitron”. Just imagine how exciting cricket will be to watch when you are spinning around and around and around. Each level could spin in opposite directions, so on those days when it’s not a sellout, you can mix it up, by moving between levels. Who needs the wave then?

And here’s the icing on the cake. each bay will be repainted black or red with a giant number painted under the seats. The MCC will then run an online betting roulette game. Punters can place bets on what bay the cricket ball will land in for every six hit in the match. Given the popularity of online gambling, this will make the MCC and Cricket Australia a BOMB.

So bring on the restraints i say. “It’s good for cricket!”

FIFA Women’s World Cup – Refereeing

Just watched part of the 2nd semi-final at the Women’s World Cup between Brazil and USA, and while the standard of play was quite good, the standard of refereeing was far from acceptable.

Handball in the box not spotted, denying the US of a penalty; a clear corner not given because the US defender fell over as she kicked it; the US goalkeeper blatantly stepping outside the penalty box while kicking the ball from her hands yet no free kick paid.

Now, the men who refereed last year Men’s World Cup were refereed last year Men’s World Cup were far from great… I remind you of the farce which was the refereeing in the Australia vs. Croatia match, but the mistakes I witnessed tonight would not have been seen made by a parent refereeing an Under 8s match on a Sunday morning… and most definitely shouldn’t be made at the World Cup level.

(apologies for any errors in spelling or grammer, but this is my first “mobile” blog posting).

Les Murray’s Team of 2006

I may have tied with him on my A-League tips this year, but I submitted my tips for the last 9 rounds back in November… what’s his excuse for getting only 35? But… I have come to the conclusion that Les Murray doesn’t know a thing about the beautiful game.

Why do I say that?

It’s his international team of the year for 2006… more precisely, his inclusion of one Vince Grella in said team.

How the hell can he justify that? He can’t… I mean… he hardly even tries to either

In this I went for Vince Grella, a choice that will raise some eyebrows given that he is Australian and so am I.

Of course there were more than a few excellent performers in this role. At the World Cup Claude Makelele of France, Costinha of Portugal and Argentina’s Javier Mascherano were other outstanding examples. England’s Steven Gerrard plays this role well, too, whenever he’s used there. But I found Grella to be as good as any of them in that position.

Where’s Zidane or Kaka? Grella, wasn’t even one of the better players for Australia at the World Cup. He doesn’t come anywhere close to being the best player in that position internationally.

There are only three possible reasons for Grella’s inclusion in Les’ team of 2006.

  1. Les has lost the plot
  2. Les was taking some strong medication at the time of compiling his list
  3. Nah… can’t think of a 3rd… that’s it… only two reasons

So… based on this, I reckon SBS should retire Les before he loses what little credebility he has left in the eyes of Australia’s football viewing public and give the job of Australia’s Mr Football to someone less likely to embarrass themself with fanciful claims such as the one made by Les here.

A-League Tips – 2006 – Round 5 to 11

Well… looks like my “set and forget” strategy is really working… not regarding tipping correctly, but definitely in the “forget” stakes… six weeks without an A-League post. I’m ashamed of myself.

Anyway… looking at my tips on footytips.com.au, my tips for the past 5 weeks appear to have been (correct tips are in bold).

Rd 5 – Syd, Qld, CCM, Melb
Rd 6 – CCM, Perth, Melb, Syd
Rd 7 – Adel, Perth, Qld, Melb
Rd 8 – CCM, NZ, Melb, Qld
Rd 9 – Perth, Melb, Qld, Adel
Rd 10 – Melb, Adel, Qld, Syd

So… as you can see, I’m not doing too well. I’m sitting on 20, ranked 1,730th out of the 14,137 tippers on footytips.com.au. More importantly, I’d be equal leader with Damien Lovelock if I was a panelist on SBS… but alas, they’re yet to ask me to join them. Also, you might have noticed I didn’t tip a single draw between Rd 5 and 10.

Think I’ll learn… my tips for the upcoming round, which were submitted over a week ago, are going to stand, and they have no draws. The tips are:

Rd 11 – Melb, New, Qld, Adel

That’s it for now… hopefully, I’ll get around to posting my tips a little more regularly.

Australia v Paraguay – 2006

I had a dream a couple of nights ago about the Australia v Paraguay match which is set to kick-off in about an hour or so. It wasn’t so much a dream, but more of a nightmare, with the Socceroos going down 1-0 in the match. When I awoke, I could hardly contain my anger and rage at Arnold and Kosmina… these two clowns shouldn’t have been given the honour of coaching Australia, even in a caretaker role, and should have been given their marching orders after the Kuwait debacle, but if my dream turns out to be a preminision, they should have their citzenship stripped and sent off to Nauru.

A-League Tips – 2006 – Round 2, 3 and 4

Couldn’t get organised enough to post my A-League tips for the last two weeks here, but I did submit them to footytips.com.au. Not that they were really anything to write about… managing only two for Round 2 and a dismal one for Round 3.

So, considering I did a fair bit better on my AFL tipping at work this year than I seem to be doing on my A-League tipping, I’m going to resort to employing my AFL tipping strategy here. It’s basically a set and forget strategy i.e. tip on the Monday and don’t worry about it until the following Monday when I check to see how I went. That said, here are my tips for Round 4.

Another aspect of the “set and forget” strategy is not caring how the experts are doing, so I’ll only compare my score to theirs every month or so.

A-League Tips – 2006 – Round 1

Finally, the second season of A-League has arrived… and once again I’ll be letting you know my tips for each round. Unlike last season though, I’ll be up against some added competition from the “experts“. Also, I’ve submitted my tips on the footytips.com.au A-League comp.The increased attention is probably a product of the success of last year and of the Socceroos at the World Cup in Germany. Regardless of the reason, it’s good to see interest growing.

So… my tips.

Melbourne Victory FC v Adelaide United FC [1:1]
Queensland Roar FC v Perth Glory FC [1:0]
New Zealand Knights FC v Newcastle Jets FC [0:1]
Sydney FC v Central Coast Mariners FC [1:1]

Let the games begin.

[Update 28/08] – The SBS team are publishing their A-League tips on the SBS World Game website.

My efforts for the round were pretty poor, managing to only tip the Qld win over Perth… this puts me on equal pegging with Damo and Andrew from SBS, Cheryl and Graham at SMH and the monkey with the keyboard ((Representing random dumb luck, i.e. what a monkey with a keyboard should be able to manage based on statistics alone)). Only Tony (SBS) has started worse. Three SMHs managed 3 right (Hazem, Anthony and Michael L ((Though Michael Lynch is actually a writer for The Age))). Interestingly, only Branko (SBS) tipped Melbourne correctly.

Finally, thanks to James over at Confessions of an A-League Junkie, I’ve discoverd and submitted a team into the A-League Fantasy Team comp over at Fox Sports.